My lawyer has told me to stop posting about D.J Fitzgerald and his cat book

And I slapped him right in his stupid face. 

Ladies and Gentlemen, the collected postings of D.J Fitzgerald: 

Daniel J. Fitzgerald

Thu, 18 Dec 2008 09:22:36

I'm a little concerned about the legality of this blog post. The cat joke book was for one my idea. You are already a very successful author, why do you feel the need to steal book ideas from up and coming authors? This has really raised some concerns about the manuscript i emailed to you. does anyone know a lawyer who covers these types of issues? I've invested all of my savings and my grandma has put in quite a bit of money for research for this book. Don't you dare steal my idea!

Second. I don't need help writing my book, actually I'm doing quite well. The book is hilarious. There is no way you could pay me a million dollars to put these foul jokes in my book. My book will be a family friendly project that aims to celebrate cats, not further the torcher and abuse towards cats that is so commonly found in today's media.

Back in Egypt cats were like princes and worshiped. The mission of this book is to bring this frame of thought back into mainstream culture.

Please no copycats.

Daniel J. Fitzgerald

Thu, 18 Dec 2008 10:57:17

Since Ben Esch is to big time to help an up and comer break into this tough profession anyone want to give me any advice in getting an agent?

Oh, and these jokes are so elementary. They all trivialize cats and their magnificent personalities. Cats are not lazy and good for nothing they are gods creatures!

Ben, I bet more than a few of your readers own an aweful t-shirt with cat's butts silkscreened on the front. Not the kind of readers a blog I would have would have.

Daniel J. Fitzgerald

Thu, 18 Dec 2008 11:10:56

Sandra, that book is already being done by me. I also am in the begining stages of writing a childrens book about a sophisticated British cat fellow who lives in high society and eats fancy people food and lives like a stock broker. So don't bother with your book idea, it's already taken. Think of your own idea please!

Daniel J. Fitzgerald

Thu, 18 Dec 2008 13:45:25

Mr. Murphy,
Are all writers this territorial? I see that you are also a successful writer with your own website ($$$). Can you just give me your agents email address so i can send him my manuscript? If it's confidential i promise i won't tell him where i got it if he asks.

I'm getting very nervous that now Mr. Esch has publicized my idea on the internet some inscruplious author who is already established, will steal it and get all the fame and fortune.

P.S. I think the tone of your last comment came off as rude/disrespectful. I don't know if you have the ability to go and edit it so it sounds a little bit more polite.

According to Google images, this is the only known photograph of Daniel J. Fitzgerald.


Daniel J. Fitzgerald, thank you for giving all of us at so much joy and happiness.  Please don't sue us.  We just want you to have the best possible joke book about cats that you can. 

As a sign of our gratitude, and in hopes of avoiding any further legal action, we would like to present Mr. Daniel J. Fitzgerald with the " person of the week." 


Note: due to the crippling number of entries, the announcement of the cat joke competition will be delayed another week.  Entries will be accepted until Christmas day.  And yes, I will be working on Christmas day.  Why?  Because I love you more than the Post Office, that's why. 

12/20/2008 11:48:06 am

Lawyers suck.

And most of them are completely inscruplious.

Daniel J. Fitzgerald
12/22/2008 12:11:14 am

I have a dream and I will carry it out! Despite you trying to bribe me. It's my book idea!

P.S. That is not me. This could be taken as slander.

4/18/2011 01:27:58 pm

This is great! It really shows me where to expand my blog. I think that sometime in the future I might try to write a book to go along with my blog, but we will see.Good post with useful tips and ideas.

7/31/2011 04:28:31 pm

The negotiators appeared to be having a hard time defining what kind of cuts would occur at the end of the year 2012 if Congress failed to act on the committee’s recommendations.


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