Hey readers,
One of the best parts about talking at a school is the Q and A session. Most questions fall on a pretty predictable path: what's your favorite book? How much money do you make? Where can I find a fashionable sweater like that? How do you manage to be both so clever AND ruggedly handsome?
But occasionally, something special happens.
Here are two of my favorite questions from my author visits.
Question: Is your ending such a disappointment because Disney made you change it?
Answer: No, that's a Ben Esch original disappointing ending.
Question: Why didn't the cops just drug test Dixie?
Answer: Because my book wouldn't work that way.
I love my job.
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Hey readers, Hey readers, Why this scene is better without profanity: Because Mr. Falcon would have been a much better name for the villain in Die Hard 2. Or any villain in any movie in the history of cinema. Seriously. Try it out for yourselves. Why this scene works better without profanity: Because the inclusion of monkey fighting snakes makes this video about a thousand times better. Seriously. This movie sucked, I think we can all admit that now. But imagine how much better it would have been if instead of Samuel L. Jackson and the fat guy from Good Burger on a plane with a bunch of snakes, we got two solid hours of no holds barred combat between a burmese python and a chimpanzee. Why this scene works better without profanity: Walter destroys some kid's car as punishment because the kid both "found a stranger in the alps" and "fed a soldier scrambled eggs." Call me crazy, but that kid doesn't sound like he deserves any punishment. Hell, if anything, he's a hero. So why's Walter so angry? There could be a roller coaster ride of emotions in unraveling that mystery. Hey readers, DOES NOT pass The Dictionary Test. Hey readers, That clip was from a movie called Shaolin Soccer which along with the value menu at El Pollo Loco, dogs in neckerchiefs, and the scone rack at Trader Joes, ranks right up there on the list of things that make me ridiculously happy.
Hey readers, Now I don't know about you guys, but I think that is goddamn hysterical. And also true: Koala bears are adorable. Author's note: I had no idea that Elvis Costello was British. But more importantly, why is that blowing my mind so much? I'm confused. Mitch died a few years ago from a drug overdose. I kinda debated about including that little tidbit, because I didn't want to bum everybody out. Now, before we get any further with this blog, I think I need to make one thing absolutely clear. I saw this video at filmdrunk. Filmdrunk is spectacular, by the way. Give them a look. I'd say more about this video, but I don't really see how I could improve it in anyway, so I'm just going to sit back and reflect for a second. Hey readers, 1. Charlie Murphy plays the mad scientist. I think his work pretty much speaks for itself. Author's note: I really want to be famous in Japan. Hey readers, This is me reading. It's a bit more exciting in real life. And here are people listening to me reading. Also, big ups to Daniel "Montgomery" Wilson for the fine picture taking.
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March 2011
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